Had to go to the breast surgeon today. The year after my mother died I had my baseline mammogram which showed a lump. This was properly disposed of a month later (Christmas holidays were rough that year) with a laser procedure. I now have yearly checkups with him. The funny thing with this doc is the routine: hug, grope, grope, hug. Now the grope is a very professional grope, he is well respected but if you have my sense of humour, well, what can I say. (All was well, by the well, same time next year).
I watch people: the waiting room had a mix of folks: those like me, by themselves, confident everything is fine; those with several support people that you know are not calm about this visit, and those kinda in between - scared but alone or not alone but maybe doing okay.
Waiting rooms are tense places, when I walk through the waiting room early in the morning to say hello to the guest reps the families look up but pay no mind. They know with my backpack on that I'm just another person. Later, should I walk out there, all eyes are on me. They look afraid: who will she pick? is it bad? Reminds me of the herd of animals with the lion picking one out. The other animals are running, no one stands by the one picked out. You feel the eyes on you, they all watch, even if they know they have never seen me in the unit they are in, they all watch.
I've forgotten about it before and gone out to see someone I knew, but not well. They were afraid when I came out and I forgot to ease the tension (family had no idea) until a few minutes passed. I felt bad. Anyway, interesting to watch.
1 comment:
Love the visual image of the lion and the scattering "dinner" animals. You are too funny. I had a patient today that I called into my office to give lab results. I smiled when I called her from the waiting room. She wanted to know right off the bat, "Is that a good smile or a bad smile." (I guess my facial expression is supposed to be a way to judge the lab results before I give them)
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