I went shopping today with my spouse. I hate shopping, well, except for book shopping. But since I've decided to really start attending church I probably needed more than one thing to wear. Scrubs are wonderul and since my work requires me to wear the same colour scrubs all the time I don't have to shop much for those. Fortunately I look good in the colour they require me to wear, at least it wasn't some sick powder blue. There are many stores close to here, but I tend to favour Dillards. When they have stuff on sale, its a good sale. I found 2 dresses with jackets that will work well with my basic black pants as well. So, four outfits for about $100. Not bad.
Here's the friends part. I was so excited I went to a friends house to show them off. This is atypical behaviour for me. I think I'm finally throwing off some of the insecurity that has always plagued me. "They don't want me to drop by." or "They are just being nice." No, I finally think they actually like me. For anyone that actually knows me, they will find this somewhat surprising. My bravado is pretty much a sham. The evidence of that was the massive panic attack that occured one Sunday at church when one of the new staff members spoke to me. A simple "hello" sent me running! My reasoning was that learning all of these peoples names is very stressful. That, and of course the fact that I wore the same clothes all the time. So now to wear the clothes with my head up, quit getting lost in the church (it was sweet, a couple of the ladies have figured out that I really don't know my way around), and act like I belong. Honestly, if someone would just drop dead, I would KNOW what I was doing and feel useful, but I can't bring myself to ask for a volunteer, I like the old people the best. Enough for now.... thanks for the one of you that actually reads this, I do love the comments.
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